What's your weirdest?

Just sitting here full to the brim after dinner - homemade Spaghetti, delicious yeast rolls and a tall glass of iced tea...when suddenly I remembered a really weird experience. I was bored out of my mind and looking for something fun to do. So, I called a pyschic. No, not the Madame Cleo T.V. type. I phoned one of the more "reputable" ones (found in the classified section of the National Enquirer) hee...hee! Anyway this bozo told me I was living my second life and in my first life I had been Sir Walter Raleigh. Hope I don't meet the same fate twice....

What's your weirdest?

Did I Mention That I Was A Freak of Nature?

Come closer...I've got a secret to tell you....Are you listening?...Good. I don't share this with many people but I'm not normal. I didn't find out about it until I reached adulthood.

All those blissful childhood years running around with the misconception that I was like everyone else. Come to think of it at the point, I was like everyone else. Then something happened that changed me...for life.

I won't keep you in suspense any longer....

I....I....I have too many teeth! (Sigh) Oh, what a weight off my shoulders. I feel better already. Confession truly is good for the soul.

Now I'll explain how the whole sorted mess unfolded. During early adulthood we've finally gained enough knowledge, life experience and good judgment to be blessed with the eruption of our wisdom teeth. Well, apparently I'm a lot wiser than most because instead of the four that everyone else I know has or had before having them extracted...I wound up with eight...That's right four at the top and four at the bottom....maybe that's why my smile is sooooo big... (random thought)

Anywho, the dentist assured me that this wouldn't create any real problems. I've always taken great care of those freakish extras plus the regular ones....never had a cavity!

Well, a few months back I chipped one of my premolars (top right) while eating a bag of cracklin.

The chipped segment was on the inside...out of my or anyone else's line of vision. No pain...no discomfort...no deformity...so, I put off going to the dentist.

Fast forward to the last month...I guess I played with fire just a bit too long because now...anything and everything causes that sucker to throb like crazy...oh, the pain...the pain. Not to mention the fact that I could hide a baby chicken in there and that's what anything I eat that gets lodged in the little space looks about the size of!

Last week I decided enough was enough. I called and scheduled an appointment with my dentist.....for today. Oh Baby Jesus, in a few hours I'll be sitting in that dreadful chair not knowing what to expect. Some coworkers have mentioned words like root canal, drill, shots (in my gum!!!).

Oh...the HORROR!

So guys...if it's not too much to ask...at 10:30am (CST) please think of me and send up prayers, happy thoughts, Hail Mary's, and incantations in hopes that everything will be all right and I don't leave the doctor's office flailing and running around like a drooling maniac wearing a bib.

That is all.

Call Me He or Call Me She....But You Better Call Me!

by Jay A Taylor

BLACK PEOPLE have contributed a lot to mainstream America and pop culture. Pace-makers, disposable syringes and hundreds of uses for previously useless vegetables and fruits, namely the Peanut.

During the age of the "flower child" when most of my generation's parents were tripping out on LSD, weed & other assorted drugs, one lucky Mother gave birth to her own pride and joy and to America's future drag Star. Enter, Rupaul, born November 17, 1960 as RuPaul Andre Charles.

RuPaul is noted among famous drag queens for his indifference towards the gender-specific pronouns used to address him. Both "he" and "she" have been deemed acceptable. "You can call me he. You can call me she. You can call me Regis and Kathie Lee; I don't care! Just as long as you call me."

In the early 90's when America was hypnotized by the likes of Steven Q. Urkel, the Tanner family and 'Living Single', this young man decided to put on his 'freekum dress' and crash the soiree. Like all viable artist, RuPaul struggled to become the woman or man he is today. This same power runs through all of us.

No matter what industry you're in, as a pioneer, you must struggle and fight with a tenacious spirit to conqueer. Life will always present challenges, no matter who you are. But someone with a dream and courage can overcome those mountains and obstacles. Then, once you reach the top, depending on your flavor, you can "pitch a tent" or "raise a flag".

So for this 'Black History Month' rant, I'd like to give a curtsy to 'RuPaul'! You better work!




 About the author ~

Jay of NY via LA, is a rising New York writer, comedian and producer by way of Los Angeles. Highly opinionated and growing up abroad, he was taught to read at an early age and was constantly exposed to a variety of ethnicities, cultures and languages.

Now, a cornucopia and collaboration of pop-culture meets class clown, toting relevant work experience on large scale projects for Fox, Sony, Disney, Coca-Cola & KTLA. From Production Assistant to Associate Producer, he proclaims, “Jack of all trades, master of none. I may not be the best at everything, but I do everything as best as I can.”

Surveying Love - Is anyone buying it?

I consider myself an extremely scholarly woman my undergraduate studies were in nursing. However I have a Master's degree in Life Experiences with an emphasis in Never Say Never which gives me great reason to distrust all the studies that are out there today - Why your mate won't cheat, What sign is most compatible with yours....yada...yada...yada.

This morning as I was doing my usual insomniac-driven internet perusing I came across two different studies. One was about what to expect sexually from certain astrological signs. In my opinion, the study is somewhat one-sided. It listed all the attributes your lover will have in bed depending on what zodiac sign HE is.

What about women? I'm quite interested in finding out some information that highlights what type lover I'm supposed to be - not for any pointers or to change any of my behaviors...but it would be fun to read.

The one study that really took the cake was the one detailing the 6 factors that will determine whether or not your husband will cheat. C'mon give me a break. If it were that easy, the divorce rate (if infidelity was a contributing factor) would be zero. You can view the list of 6 for yourself at AOLhealth. But in a nutshell, if the guy window shops in front of you (not suppressing his animal lust), is uglier than you, cries during sappy movies, participates in arguments with you, goes to church and makes less money than you....HE'S A KEEPER.

Sounds to me like your forever faithful would be a bucked-tooth, broke wimp who cried everytime you argued. So, please ladies...stop looking for that handsome, financially independent guy who's the epitome of masculinity. Okay, I'm being a bit condescending. I just wonder when people will learn....we are too individual and unique to be studied and surveyed concerning certain issues or any issues pertaining to the science of love. Love is and always will be as close to insanity as any of us want to get - love has no rhyme or reason. It's a matter of the heart.

I guess it's up to the reader to decide how much weight to give this type information. However, for those who take it seriously, this study is certain to help sky-rocket an ugly dudes chances and his ego. Isn't self-esteem a wonderful thing?

** If you ever get tired of reading this stuff click here. Wouldn't that be wonderful?


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Note:

This post was written a while back. I always thought it was a pretty decent expenditure of time but it never received a single comment. It's 5:58a.m Tuesday morning...I've been up since 5pm Sunday (with the exception of 2 hours of sleep yesterday between 2:30pm and 4:30pm....I couldn't have come up with anything fresh if my life had depended on it...

Hope you enjoy :-)

Just When You Think You Can Trust People Your Freakin' Blackberry "Starts Blowing Up!

Why Lord, Why! It's more a cry of frustration than a question.

One of the most annoying things ever is constantly checking that little red flashing light on my Blackberry only to discover it's email spam...over and over and over again.

I thought I was careful. I set up about 4 different email accounts. The yahoo, hotmail, webmail and other bogus email addresses I have were designated as the accounts for playing around. I would list these addresses when I wasn't sure how confidential certain site's that requested my email address were going to be.

All claim they'll never disclose your email info....it's kept in the strictest of confidence and will not be bartered off to the highest bidder....yeah...right.

But like I said...these were my I'm-just-playing-around-and-don't-care-how-much-email-spam-I-get-on-these-accounts accounts.

The one I take seriously....and use for real life business is my AOL account. So, when setting up my send/receive email on my Blackberry this is the account I chose to use.

I knew I would only be receiving the important stuff and not have to worry about Nigerian millionaires willing to share their fortune and left kidney with me....for a nominal fee emails on my phone.

Well wouldn't you know someone has gone and pawned my AOL email off to the highest bidder and I'm bombarded with that annoying red flashing light 24 hours a day. Sometimes I have as many as 40 emails from some of the craziest folks offering the stupidest crap.

I thought maybe deleting them on my phone then logging in to AOL mail and marking them all as spam would stop the problem...Apparently marking items as spam and not having to be worried about seeing them in your INBOX again only works for me with my Yahoo Mail account....should have used that one.

Eventually, I'm guessing I'll have to change my email set up on my phone which is going to suck royally.

Or, maybe I'll just learn to ignore the annoying red blinking light!

I guess things could be worse. The Nigerians millionaires could start up again......

Mixed Messages for Olympic Athletes in Vancouver

You dress an Olympic athlete like a common street thug - case and point...U.S. Olympic Snowboarding uniform pictured above minus the bandanas, iPods and other accessories. You provide over 100,000 condoms to the athletes competing in the games in Vancouver... (or what has been described as a sexfest by past Olympics athletes). Then you have the audacity to deem Scotty Lago's conduct inappropriate.

"Scotty Lago is a great athlete, but with that comes a responsibility of proper conduct, and his involvement in this situation is not acceptable," U.S. Ski and Snowboard Association President and CEO Bill Marolt said in an e-mail. "Scotty realizes his conduct was inappropriate. He has formally apologized and also made a decision to leave Vancouver today."

What about your conduct Olympic Committee and U.S. Ski and Snowboard Association? Supplying condoms for safe sex....I applaud you....but you're condoning the same risque behavior you snubbed this bronze medalist for....oops...my mistake...I don't know whether he got a chance to use one of the condoms you guys supplied or not! What he did...was just a guy....a very young guy....having fun.

This kid is 22 years old and has achieved something most of us never could imagine in our wildest dreams. He was at a party celebrating with every other 20 something-er and a fan, bystander, girlfriend...heck, I don't know who she was...got a little carried away. Take a look for yourself......

IMO, this is the biggest over reaction I've seen since....since....John Mayer claimed his schlong was a white supremacist....LMBO...

That's a whole 'nother story!

Curious....

Now this next photo is not of a young guy having fun....it's a pic of the gold medalist, Lindsey Vonn....courtesy of Sports Illustrated.....But I guess the Ski Association and Olympic Committee is okay with a half naked woman being a positive role model for their sport!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm Ready For My Close Up Mr. Demille cause I'm Beautiful!!

I've been called many things on many occasions but being called beautiful twice in one week is enough to swell any girl's head.

Yes dear friends, I've been honored by two bloggy buddies with the Beautiful Blogger Award. Evelyn over at Natural Raw Living and Cat Lady Larew over at How To Become A Cat Lady Without The Cats were sweet enough to think of little old me.

 

 Isn't it pretty???

Even being beautiful comes with responsibility!

And all I have to do to accept the award is...

1. Thank, then link to the person that gave me the award - Check!
2. Pass this award on to 7 bloggers I've recently discovered and whom I think are fantastic - Check!
3. Contact said Blogs to let them know they've won. - In Progress!
4. State 7 Things about myself! - Check!

My seven recently discovered beautiful bloggers are:
1. Renee @ Highly Favored
2. C.T. @ CTKingston.com
3. Jayne @ In Jayne's World
4. Tim @ Mr. Muddle's Befuddled Universe
5. Jay @ NY|VIA|LA
6. Mr. Tramuel @ It's Me...Mr. Tramuel
7. I honestly have no other newly discovered beauties...but I'm working on it!

Now...the boring part - 7 Things About Me

1. I'm left handed and so are both my sons.
2. I'm the natural mother of these boys. Yet, I never experienced labor. Thank you God!!!
3. I met my father for the first time when I was 20 years old. He died 3 years later.
4. Roschelle isn't my real name...well it kind of is...it's my middle name.
5. My favorite color is black.
6. The idea of death frightens me....not because I'm afraid of dying...I'm afraid of not existing
7. I have three tattoos. One on my right outer ankle, lower back (my oldest son refers to this one as a "tramp stamp"...lol and one on my right arm....

Why Can't The World Be More Like The Twitterverse

How often do you read the latest headlines, make it home alive after dealing with rush hour traffickers suffering from the worst cases of road rage you've ever seen, watch people being rude to one another for no reason other than the fact that most of us simply don't give a damn about our fellow man anymore....and just shake your head at the state our world is in?

It seems that people have just stopped caring. Whatever happened to that age old saying "to err is human...to forgive is divine"? Or how about that good one Jesus broke up the mob with...."Let he who is without sin...cast the first stone".

As childish and silly as it may sound, I find the entire internet experience a refreshing break away from real life.

Whether people actually mean it or not...when readers of this blog or some of the great people I tweet with express their concern over what's going on in my life there's a sincerity....a niceness resonating from their comments that is far too often absent in the real world.

Now I could be sadly mistaken and the harsh reality may be that folks in my cyber world don't give a camel's toe (oops...poor word choice) whether I live or die. However, perception is reality - like it or not.

Prime example of some of society's bottom feeders in action. Tiger Woods takes the world stage earlier today....to play golf...heck no!...to apologize AGAIN for something he did to his wife!

He didn't cheat on his fans. He didn't cheat on his sponsors. He didn't cheat on his mother. He cheated on Elin! After the press conference (15 minutes that the world stood still), people want to analyze...he didn't sound sincere....he was reading too much....he should have used a teleprompter....he didn't apologize to the whores he cheated with!

Are you kidding me? What do you want from this guy? I've made no qualms about the way I feel about what Tiger did. But it's not about me and what I think. Where's the "everyone deserves a second chance".

You're villainizing him and auctioning off JFK's love letters to one of his many mistresses in the same breath!!!!!

The only place I actually saw any "atta boy Tiger"...."hopefully you and your wife will make it through this"....."he really seemed sincere"....were tweets I read after the press conference. Most TV shows, articles and other know-it-alls continue to question his sincerity....I say...screw 'em Tiger! not literally, of course O_O

Oh, I almost forgot.....there's the little cocky Russian figure skating prick who thinks he was cheated out of his gold medal. How dare he hop across Evan Lysacek's gold spot during the medal ceremony - just more rudeness and disregard for other's feelings. And as far as Putin's little your silver is gold comment to Mr. 5 o'clock shadow...PUT A LID ON IT (we're watching you thanks to Sarah!)

So excuse me if I spend countless hours tweeting, following new tweeters and sharing 140 character snapshots of my most uninteresting day to day activities. At times, it's just a nicer place to be than the real world alternative.

It's the one thing that gives me hope in humanity....cause real life...sometimes....is just too ugly.

I Remember the Old Days...

The stories my mom used to share with me about how hard "they had it" when she was growing up were legendary. I would listen attentively as she shared her tales of wearing hand-me-downs that weren't fit for the Goodwill trash bin, missing school because helping her mom in the field was more important, gathering kindling and wood for the wood-burning stove before going to bed....it all seemed so unreal which is the same expression my eight year old gave me a few days ago when I told him about the old days.

Yes, my love there was a time when the television went off without having to be turned off. Remember the eagle soaring past old red, white and blue right before that wretched humming noise and then....silence with that awful colorful array of bar graph looking lines that made it clear that television was closed for the night.

Or how about walking to the library to gather reference material for your science project, term paper or anything else that required encyclopedic reference material.

Googling for anything would have been a term that probably would have landed you in the principal's office.

We did have four encyclopedias at home. I think they were A, F, I and L. My mother managed to get these four gems free with a $25 grocery purchase (on four different occasions) at the local Safe Way.

If you arrange the letters in the way having only four encyclopedias feels to a ten year old ....you get the word FAIL!!!

He was so amazed and curious as to how I managed to get anything done with no internet, cell phone, daily cartoons or a gazillion video games with 2 or 3 different consoles....and even more perplexed at the idea of going outside and playing until the street lights came on.

I could tell he was kind of settling in to the notion that life....wasn't all that bad. I made the memories of enjoying Saturday morning cartoons, reading good books, and harmless mischief while walking to and from the neighborhood library sound pretty good.

That warm fuzzing feeling he was developing came to a screeching halt after I shared the last memory of a time gone forever with him...and that was the fact that a microwave was unheard of (at least in my house) until the mid 80s!

He got all wide-eyed and wanted to know how on earth we were able to eat things like leftovers, popcorn, frozen meals, or even heated water for hot cocoa....lol.

Come to think of it....how on earth did we ever SURVIVE??!

Progress on The Natural State of Things

Back in early December I posted about my decision to leave hot combs, hair relaxers, texturizers and all other forms of chemicals designed to alter the composition of my hair....alone.

I've remained true to that and can finally say...I AM COMPLETELY CHEMICAL FREE.

The last chemical assault on my hair was back in July of last year. I've since had several hair cuts....mostly to taper and shape the style. But in doing so, any remnants of chemicals were also cut away.

So, I am officially rocking what I've come to learn is referred to as the TWA - Teeny Weeny Afro.

It's a long way from where I want to be but it's easy, manageable and a great conversation piece - Your hair is so cute like that....I could never wear my hair that short....You have the face for that. And I always urge any and all interested in trying it....to do so.

It's just hair!

I promised to keep you guys posted with pics detailing my journey. So here I am.

It really isn't all that different from my profile pic. The only real difference is the color and the fact that it's my hair's natural texture.

I'm learning a lot about products.....what's good...what's not so good....I've got so much coconut milk, tea tree this, shea butter that....lol. My hair products are more organic than the things I eat! But I'm working on that too.

Until next time....

Wordless Wednesday

 

Now that's funny!!!

Keeping It in The Middle of The Road Is Not Working

Can we agree that the middle class in America are the ones getting the short end of the stick as far as taxes are concerned. We work 40+ hour work weeks, pay taxes as we go and still usually end up owing Uncle Sam, a relative I disowned long ago, at the end of the year. Where's my break, my bailout, my refund check for taking care of those less fortunate than me all year long?

I have just as many kids as Mary Beth. But because I made $10,000 more than Mary Beth...some of which went to Mary Beth for food, medical care and child care I still wind up owing dear ole Uncle while Mary Beth saves her last pay stub from 2009....sprints to the nearest Speedee Tax....electronically files her return and wakes up in less than 48 hours with over $6,000 in her bank account. Hell, I've even heard some people have received close to $10,000....and for what....not working, not making a certain amount. Sounds like the perfect incentive to keep people in poverty - it friggin' pays!

Flip the coin and then you have the Thurston Howell the thirds. These guys make millions. However, because of the ability to form their own foundations, organizations, and charities and yada yada yadas...they're able to write off thousands and thousands...if not millions of dollars.

I have no doubt that I'm looking at it from a very biased perspective. I don't profess to know all the ins and outs about taxes, tax codes, deductions, and earned income credit.

All I know is there's something not quite right about our current way of doing things. How can Bush, Obama and any other POTUS past or present bailout WALL STREET and send me a notice threatening to levy shit that I don't even own if I don't pay them $12,000....which by the way started out around $6,000 but because of penalties and interests....just keeps growing and growing and growing and growing.

Sometimes I really think it would have been a whole lot easier to have not wasted the time to get a good education in hopes of securing a good job.

I could be sitting at home in a $750/month apartment...(my section 8 package could pay $600 of that), receiving free health care (paid for by folks like me), waiting on the first of the month....that is still check day isn't it?

......seems to me like more than just health care needs reforming around here!!!!!!!!!!!!

How To Have a Better Twitter Experience with Lists

A couple of months back I published a post outlining my opinion on Twitter Etiquette...if there really is such a thing. To sum up the post I offered my take on follow to follow (the practice of following those who follow you). I received a lot of feedback about that idea. Those opposed to this practice mentioned not wanting to be bothered with tons of people in their Twitter stream sharing 140 character jibberish that they really weren't interested in reading....and that makes great sense. However, there's a way around that problem that I recently discovered. Let me share.

Your Twitter homepage shows you things like your profile pic, how many people you're following, how many people are following you and the number of lists you've been included in.

For the longest I had no clue how to create a list or why I would need to. Well that's back when I only had about 1,600 people following me. Now I have close to 6,000 and believe me...that can be very confusing....and that's where lists become critical.

 

Your lists can be whatever you want them to be. I currently have ten lists but you can create as many as you like or as few as you'd like. This is a perfect way to catalog and categorize your followers.

Each time you follow someone take the time to read their bio and take a look at their timeline. Is this person a blogger, musician, counselor.....do they live in the same part of the country as you.....maybe you share the same occupation in real life.

Once you've gotten your lists started it's time to put them to use.

Maybe today I only want to tweeter with my "southern girls". I click on that listing and I'll only see tweets from people I have in that particular list. All of your followers will see your tweets but you'll only be able to see those from folks in that list. So, occasionally clicking on your @roschelle or @whateveryourtwitternameis will show you tweets that have been sent directly to you.

 

Hopefully, this doesn't sound like a lot of work. I usually have lots of fun with it. Happy Tweeting!!!

Today's the Loveliest Day of The Year...

I know lots of people don't spend an enormous amount of fuss over Valentine's Day. It's customarily a day for new love - showering him or her with sweets, flowers, jewelry or some other display of love and affection. Blame it on me being a hopeless romantic...but I (in spite of it all) still think this is one of the sweetest days ever.

I was never to crazy about flowers. They were impressive as far as making your coworkers green with envy...but they die way too soon and cost w-a-y too much.

The candy, on the other hand, is and always has been a goody for me. I LOVE chocolate. So, a person after my heart could never go wrong by lavishing me with tons of the sweet stuff....I'll deal with calories and cavities later.

As the years have gone by, I've discovered what's truly important about this day dedicated to love and that's.....being with the one you love and knowing that there's no place on Earth either of you would rather be than with one another on today or any other day.

So, today after I called my first true love and wished him a Happy Valentine's Day, I took my second truest love out for a delicious, love inspired breakfast....

Happy Valentine's Day Sweetheart!!

(pay no attention to the old geezers in the background)

You Gotta Love Babies

Two of the cutest baby videos I've EVER seen.....Enjoy! The 2nd one is really cute!

With Friends Like These...

Working nights and leaving my babies unattended always makes me feel like a bad mother. I imagine these two get rather lonely lurking around the house, having pillow fights with my couch pillows, scooping cat food out of their bowl and onto the floor, deciding what kitchen drawer they want to turn into a bed, chewing the artificial flowers off my dining table centerpiece and arguing over watching Animal Planet or...well that's the only channel they can watch....probably can be very stressful for them.

Every morning upon my return home they greet me at the door with loads of meows and flopping over on their sides for unlimited belly rubs.

They follow me around until I fix them breakfast and refresh their water. Then it's meal time.

I never see any traces of blood or excess fur. So, I know that they haven't injured each other during my absence. But OMG!!....it never fails. Before the three of us retire for our much needed beauty sleep....at least one fight breaks out.

Coco, the youngest, smallest and female, usually starts the brawl. They slap, growl, hiss and then tie up into a big ball of fur, paws, and whiskers. It's actually pretty funny.

After they grow tired of rolling around like two idiots, one of them will scamper off and lay in wait to spring on the other when he's least expecting....and it starts all over again.

I used to try and break up the arguments but I actually think it's more play than actual fighting.

Whatever the case...it sure is funny.

Oh...BTW...this is the instigator...acting as if she's done nothing wrong....such a manipulator!!

Theme Thursday: 2/11/2010 - Mirror

A great way to battle away blogger's block is participating in some fun memes and themes. It seems that every day of the week is filled with a fun idea for a blog post.

Inspired by one of my new bloggy buddies Cat Lady Larew, I decided to participate in Theme Thursday.

Lady Larew's post was pretty cool. Please check it out and make sure to check out some of the other posts that can be found here.

The theme for this week is MIRROR.

My mirror (couldn't find one exactly like the one I remember) is one of those vintage babies from the 70s - the lighted makeup mirror!

My aunt had the coolest one ever. I was only 9 or 10 years old so, there was no way I was going to get away with wearing makeup in public...but God bless my folks....they were more than happy to let me make a complete show of myself (for their entertainment purposes only) inside the house.

I remember gathering my makeup supplies and setting up the mirror for the job at hand. The mirror had two sides. A regular side for the way you looked to yourself and a magnified view for the way you looked to everybody else...lol

I steered clear of the magnified side (just a lil' too creepy). But I always chose the evening setting. I assumed most people wore makeup at night...for nights out with the girls, dinner with that special someone...you know...the kinds of things kids think adults do when they're away from the house.

I wonder what happened to that mirror. It would be absolutely awesome to see now.

I even found a pic that reminded me of some of my earlier attempts at applying makeup in my magic makeup mirror....

Wordless Wednesday

 

Just a lil' more rope...

 

Maybe a teleprompter would have been more aesthetically correct...

So What Do You Want to Be Called? Hurry Up and Make Up Your Mind!!!

Okay...here we go again with another story that is no more worthy of being news than the fact that I clipped my baby toenail too short and now I'm suffering every time that pinky toe touches the inside of a shoe!

The latest non-news: The term "negro" on the 2010 census has some people of color upset. According to the Los Angeles Times many blacks, upon discovering this abomination reacted with shock and distaste. They see it as a relic of the bad old days of segregation.

Now I'm about to step on some toes but at this point I don't give a flying rat's you-know-what whose toes I step on!

Just how many names do we have to be before we can finally pick one that suits everyone's fancy. Negro is too incendiary. Colored is too Jim Crow-ish, Afro-American is too out dated. African-American is too broad a description.....what in the hell do you (we) want to be called.

I really don't think we know. You've got the United Negro College Fund (UNCF), The National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP), Black Entertainment Television (BET) and a host of black comedians, rappers, racists and other insensitive pricks calling people of color niggers all day....oh but I forget...if you spell it n-i-g-g-a it's hip and shouldn't be viewed as offensive.

Give!

Me!

A Break!!!

At this stage in the game, I can relate more to black than any other term...and by george...we've certainly had plenty to choose from. 

The only race that doesn't have a plethora of choices on the census form are whites....or should I say Caucasians....but then that's not exactly right either. Although Negro is the spanish via latin translation for black. Caucasian (contrary to what some think) is not a foreign translation for white.

According to the actual definition of Caucasian - it was used to denote the general physical type of some or all of the indigenous human populations of Europe, North Africa, the Horn of Africa, West Asia, Central Asia, and South Asia without regard to race or skin tone.

So theoretically, I could actually be a Caucasian-African-American. I'm told that there's a possibility that we (MANKIND) are all African. Unfortunately as a descendant of slaves, I really don't know where I'm from. I understand that it is likely that my ancestors originated in Africa since most slaves were kidnapped or purchased from that continent and wound up here....but just as sure as their are people of color scattered all over this planet...there's no guarantee that my hypothesis is correct.

Oh...hell why does life have to be so difficult? BECAUSE SOME TIMES WE MAKE IT THAT WAY!!!!

So to all my people of color that will be completing the 2010 census.....just check the darn box you feel most comfortable with and stop making a mountain out of a mole hill.  And the next time Cedric the Entertainer, Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle, Eddie Murphy, Jay-Z, Lil Wayne or your first cousin calls you a nigger.....

Slap The Hell Out of Them .....as a favor to me! We may not be able to agree on what we want to be called...But that word should be shocking and distasteful to ALL OF US.

Who Dat?! - We Celebrate With You!!!

 

Tears were shed as I listened to Americans being referred to as refugees in their own country....

We watched as thousands packed into the Louisiana Superdome with no food, water or adequate toileting facilities....

There was a renewal of spirit and pride for the people of New Orleans and the people of this country when the Saints were finally able to once again take the field in the Superdome...

And last night the one game that had forever eluded this franchise was theirs for the taking.  The deal was sealed by Tracy Porter's interception!!! The New Orleans Saints were SUPER BOWL CHAMPIONS!!!

 

Saints 31 ......Colts 17

MVP Quarterback Drew Brees

Congratulations Saints and God Bless the wonderful people of New Orleans Louisiana!!!

I'm sure you won't mind but I'm....

 

Have a beautiful day! See ya soon....

Don't Worry Daisy.....I'll Save Harley!

** I'm constantly rambling on and on about the great people I've met via the internet. I think it's safe to say that the world wide web has been a life changing social networking medium that's helped filled the void created by the sheer size of our planet and managed to bring different countries, cultures and people closer together.

I've developed friendships with people I would have never met in a million years just by logging in. Their lives, relationships, jobs, hobbies, families, hopes and dreams matter...not just to them....but to me as well. And that's why I feel compelled to call for an intervention on behalf of one of my dearest friends.

The person in trouble....well he isn't actually a person. He's a cat and his name is Harley.

NO!...not her, silly. That's Daisy....Harley is Daisy the curly cat's brother. Daisy is a feline fashionista who lives in Florida with her mommie, daddy and brother, Harley.

Her wardrobe is to d-i-e for....I so wish I was her size.

About two weeks ago Daisy informed us (yeah...I know...but Daisy and Harley both talk...or maybe they just type on their blog) that her mommie and daddy both had gotten new jobs and wouldn't be home as much.

Daisy is the more responsible of the two and has spent time alone before.....all the more reason she's worried about Harley. According to Daisy, Harley has never been home alone and how he would adjust was of great concern to her.

Because I'm so attached to these two I vowed to do what I could to keep an eye out for any suspicious behavior. Since I don't live in Florida, I hired a purr-ivate investigator. He reported back to me a short while ago with details and photos of what Harley's been up to while mommie and daddy have been away.

I knew Daisy would never snitch on her brother....you know that snitches get stitches thing kind of gave her nightmares. But I must put a stop to this once and for all.

And Harley if you're reading this...just know I did this out of love.

Now for all the sorted details:

It appears that Harley, unbeknownst to his parents, has been leaving home as soon as they're clear of the house. He's been seen around town at several popular hot spots driving a dark sports car and cavorting with some rather loose women.

One of these skeezers ladies convinced Harley to pose for some rather risque photographs. Please...if you have small children in the room that may be able to view your computer, ask them to leave now.

Ten Things That Make Me Happy

One of the coolest things about the blogosphere is receiving awards and recognition from fellow bloggers. There's really no greater compliment than those you receive from your peers...friends...blogging buddies....well, you get the picture.

Staci over at Just Bloggled: When Life Gets a Little Baffling presented me with the Happy 101 Blog Award.

The rules require you to come up with 10 things that make you happy, as well as 10 blogs or bloggers that make you happy to pass the award on to.

Hope I'm not cited by the better-follow-the-rules-or-else blog police but I think I'm going to change it up just a little bit.

Before I begin my list of happy things I'd like to present all my regular readers with this award. You and I know who you are. And you guys are great!

I don't mind admitting that I don't always manage to get around to the blogs listed in my "Daily Reads" or my blog roll every day. So, seeing my blogging buddies pop in and leave comments really gets me motivated on those days when I chose laziness over entertainment. And for that I say thank you and please accept this award from me to you!

Now for my list of 10 things that make me happy:

I Need a Beer Because the Aspirin Didn't Help

I'm sure everyone's family is full of some pretty unusual characters and my genetic pool sharers are no different. I've already introduced you to the more colorful ones. So, for the most part...nothing members of this clan do surprises me...until yesterday.

After being chased down by the law for exceeding the speed limit (yep, I got a ticket), I stopped by my aunt's house to drop off my niece and nephew.

My uncle...not her husband...her brother walked out to the car to greet me as he always does.

Now let me give you a little history on dear sweet Unk.

He's a former army man, kick ass black belt, world traveler and a recovering drub abuser. Unk has been living with his sister for almost a year...you know trying to get his life back on track. And I must admit he's doing a great job.

What makes this family member so colorful is the fact that he's the spitting image of Martin Lawrence's Jerome character.....from the processed hair to the gold toof-es to the side leaning pimp walk.

Folks...this is MY uncle!!

Well yesterday while old pimp uncle and I were chit chatting (me sitting in the car...him leaning over talking through the passenger side door)....he made his move.

"Niecey I've got a terrible headache and the aspirin didn't help. I need you to do something for me." Oh Lord...here it comes. I'm thinking he's gonna ask me to get him something stronger. That would have been intervention time for sure.

So I'm like what is it....{waiting}. "I need you to drive down there to the store and get me a beer."

"A beer!" I snapped. "And that's gonna cure your headache?" He looked over his glasses at me and said "works everytime".

I didn't drive to the store to buy Unk the beer but I did give him a buck fifty which is what he said he needed to purchase his pain killer.

He thanked me and as I drove away, I could see Jerome Unk with his side leaning pimp walk making his way up the street to the store.

Lesson learned: The next time you're suffering with a headache and medication doesn't seem to be doing the job....head to your nearest convenience store and purchase the tallest cheapest can of beer you can find.

Like dear old Unk said...works everytime!

If You Thought Burning Bras was Awesome....Try Burying Your Thong!

Have you ever been so desperate to change something that's been a proverbial "thorn in your side" that you were willing to do almost anything - even the unimaginable?

Well that's exactly were I was about 10 years ago.

I was working in the ER at a local hospital. It was an unusually slow day...you know the one's were the girls can sit around and chit chat about the secret things that all females sit around and chit chat about...details forbidden since I suppose a few men may check out this post.

As I got up to go for my 4th cup of coffee, I did what almost every member of the human species has done at one time of another....I adjusted my panties. Can't explain it but for some reason that left butt cheek just can't seem to understand that it's supposed to stay within the confines of the device invited to hold everything together....so, there I was digging for gold.

One of my coworkers blurted out "I never have that problem. I started wearing thongs a few years ago. The best thing I ever did".

Now mind you this chick is about 5'4 and weighs atleast 215lbs. My initial reaction was how in the hell do you find it once you get undressed. But I am civilized so instead I said "I don't think it would be very comfortable. I'm already doing the panty adjusting thing at least every 2 hours. I can't imagine a constant wedge right up the center of my rump!"

She went on to say how you don't even feel them....I'm sure she didn't!

Not wanting to be out done by a big girl, I decided to invest in a few pair. Once I did it was like...wow, no panty line...no tugging...but damn....I can't shake the feeling that something's stuck in the crack of my (expletive)!

I didn't completely give up on the idea. I wore thongs on special occasions....events that required the little black dress to fit just so....when I felt like being sexy at home...you know the usual.

Good ole hubby liked 'em too. It was the strangest thing. Whenever I wore a thong around him he always wanted me to crawl across the bed like a little kitten....you know up on all four...slinking around like a porn star reject! It was totally embarrassing. So, instead I would just dive under the covers as usual and demand he turn the light off...what can I say...I'm modest!

Well fast forward to yesterday. Cosmopolitan published an article proclaiming The Thong is DEAD! Oh, I can hear millions of men groaning everywhere and gazillions of women breathing a sigh of relief.

Apparently the atrocious sight of butt cracks covered with a string the size of a spaghetti noodle isn't as sexy as one might think. And I completely understand.

The thong was designed to ensure NVPL...that's No Visible Panty Line. It was meant to be inconspicuous and totally untraceable. But with the rise in popularity of the low rise jeans...the two just weren't working out.

If you've never worn a thong but are now totally interested in trying one out, Google has a few predefined topics that may help you make the right decision.

Yesterday Was the Beginning at the End

Well as of yesterday I am officially d-i-v-o-r-c-e-d. It has taken one year and two months to sort out all the details, court ordered proclamations, custody/visitation, and property settlement. To the unknowing...you would have thought we were J.R and Sue Ellen Ewing. But alas, it was little old me and little old him.

My attorney's office called me about a week ago telling me that the paperwork was ready. I wasn't in any real hurry. I figured since "he" had drawn it out for over a year with foolishness...one more week really wasn't all that bad.

After being separated for nearly 3 years now, I thought I would slip a few shots of Tequila and three male strippers in my purse for an impromptu celebration as soon as the ink dried on the documents.....gotta get a bigger purse.

The strange thing is as I sat there proof reading the paperwork...looking for any undotted i's or uncrossed t's....the idea of a celebration wasn't even close to what I was feeling.